Admittance Through Fear
by Quill of Minerva
Summary: Voldemort wants Albus to admit his greatest weakness but will the wise Headmaster confess what's in his heart as well? And will the two things be the same?


**Disclaimer:** We wish we were lucky enough to own them but unfortunately they're not ours.

**A/N:** This is a story co-written with Ang. of Hogwarts Duo. We wrote it during a role-playing game and we hope you will find it as enjoyable as we did. And please, take a minute to tell us your thoughts on it. Also, this is set before Lily and James Potter were killed.We were working under the assumption that there was an Order, based on OOTP where Harry was shown an old photo.

**Summary: **Voldemort wants Albus to admit his greatest weakness but will the wise Headmaster confess what's in his heart as well? And will the two things be the same?****

**_Admittance Through Fear_**

Albus Dumbledore was at his wits end. Minerva McGonagall had been missing for two days. The Order was searching for her but there had been no sightings yet. It was as though she had vanished into thin air. He had contacted all of her friends and her remaining family but none of them had seen or heard from her since the end of the school term two weeks prior. She had owled a few people to say that she planned to stay at Hogwarts to work on her lesson plans and enjoy her summer in peace. In fact, had it not been for their regular chess matches and walks along the lake in the cool of the evening, he might have assumed that she was still locked in her rooms with her work.

He was worn out, though he would not admit it. He could not rest until she was found safe and sound. So many fears were running through his overactive mind. None of them was helping the situation. As the last of the Order members reported back without any new ideas on what might have happened, Albus dropped into his chair as a fear like none he had ever known gripped his heart. Minerva was missing and there were no clues that might lead him to her. For the fifth time in two days, he made his way to her rooms and searched them again. Silently, he hoped to find her there with some explanation but in his mind he knew that was not going to happen. If he was lucky, though, he might find something that he had previously overlooked.

He walked into her rooms and was hit by the overwhelming smell of her. It was intoxicating and was a painful reminder that she wasn't there. If he allowed himself, he could get lost in a dream with just one whiff of her perfume that always reminded him of a beautiful field of flowers on spring day. But time was too precious to daydream today. She was missing and he had to find her before something terrible happened.

He took a moment to just observe the familiar rooms. He had been in her private living quarters countless times during their long friendship and to him nothing seemed out of place. The books were stacked neatly, waiting to be reshelved. Her unanswered owls were still on her desk with notes in the margins for her to put into more formal thoughts. Even their unfinished chess game was untouched, despite the weary pieces that longed for an end to the game so they could return to their case. Absently, Albus picked up Minerva's queen and began to speak to her.

"I know I've asked you this before, but is there anything you can remember that might help me find her?" The deep blue marble piece looked up into his weary face and shook her head. She could tell that the great Albus Dumbledore was worried and that was enough to worry the entire castle.

He set the queen down on the chessboard and rested his head in his hands. He couldn't understand what had happened. He had seen her the morning she had disappeared. She had popped into his office and told him that she was just going into Hogsmeade to fetch a few things. When he went to her rooms later for their afternoon tea, he noticed that she had not returned. He had foolishly assumed that she had bumped into a former student or an old friend and had lost track of time. After all, she never missed their afternoon tea and cocoa chats. They were among the favorite pastimes of both involved and it gave them a chance to unwind a bit in the middle of the day.

But when she had not shown up for dinner that evening, he knew something was wrong. He had asked around to see if anyone had seen her and all he received were blank looks as his answer. His worry only increased when an owl arrived asking why she hadn't picked up the supplies she had gone to collect. It was then that he understood the severity of the situation and contacted the Order members immediately. Until they reported back, there was nothing to do but wait and hope for the best. Now that they had all contacted him with nothing new, he was utterly dumbfounded. Sitting in her favorite high backed chair, he tried to logically assess the situation.

Suddenly something caught Albus' eyes. The grand, ornate medieval mirror that had been a gift from her grandmother was glowing. He watched as words began to form on the glass. _It's driving you mad, isn't it?_

Albus blinked furiously, unable to believe what he was seeing. Minerva had never mentioned the magical properties of this mirror and yet the message was clearly meant for him. He stared at it for a solid minute before rising from his seat and crossing the room to inspect it. The rich mahogany mirror stood proudly in the corner of her sitting room and his mind raced back to the first time he had ever seen it.

The week after her grandmother had died, Minerva had been irritable and depressed, despite his efforts to cheer her. He thought he was making a little progress one morning over breakfast and then the owl arrived from her father, asking her to please come home. She had asked Albus to go with her for moral support and he had agreed without any reservations.

When they arrived at the McGonagall home, Minerva was told that her grandmother had left her a most prized possession and a note. Handing her the faded bit of parchment, she soon learned that she was to inherit a special mirror, one that she had admired since her childhood. Her grandfather had made it for her grandmother as a wedding present. Ever since she and Albus had carefully transported it back to Hogwarts, Minerva had always kept it in excellent condition, just as her grandmother would have wanted.

The carvings on the mirror depicted two sturdy trees, one representing his side of the family and the other hers and as the two trees met, there were dozens of small branches that reached toward the heavens. Minerva had often been told that those branches symbolized the love of her grandparents and their wishes for a large family. According to Minerva, her grandmother had even taken the time to name each particular branch when a new child was born to them and when they entered school, their house crest would be carved there as well. In looking at the mirror now, one could see why Minerva was head of Gryffindor house, as it seemed almost all of her family had been sorted into the most noble of houses.

Albus reached out and tentatively touched the mirror, receiving a shock as his fingertip touched the words. "Who are you and what has happened to Minerva," he demanded in a voice that clearly showed his power. If this mirror was connected in any way to Minerva, he must find a way to use it to his advantage and help her in any way he could.

Albus stared at the mirror waiting for an answer. When it seemed like the mirror wasn't going to reply, it did. Deep red writing appeared on the mirror. _You feel useless, don't you Albus?_

The most powerful wizard of modern times found himself infuriated by the tauntings of a mirror. "I don't know who you are but it's obvious that you have Minerva. What is it you want?" He had never been one to give into the demands of those using their powers for evil but until he could discover the secret of the mirror and return Minerva safely, he felt he had no other choice.

The writing on the mirror appeared quicker this time. _Temper, temper Professor!_

Albus stared at the mirror, quickly contemplating what to do. He knew better than to do anything that would in any way harm or destroy the mirror. Minerva would never forgive him. Instead, he decided to play along in the hopes that whoever was behind her disappearance would slip up and reveal something of use. "Obviously, you know who I am and you have Minerva. But do I know you," he asked the mirror, trying to keep his voice at an even pitch to hide his impatience.

Elaborate, gothic style red writing quickly appeared across the mirror. _She is well for the moment but I feel there is a need for us to talk._

"You have my undivided attention, but how did you know about this mirror? And what assurances do I have that she is unharmed? Since you can apparently see me, I would like to see Minerva, to know that she is well."

_I know about this mirror because she told me, Albus and I suppose you can see her_, wrote the mirror before the writing vanished. Immediately, the writing and Albus' reflection were replaced with an image of Minerva. For the most part, she looked unharmed. Her hair had come loose from her trademark bun and her clothes looked a bit disheveled but there were no signs of torture or abuse. He noted too that she was wearing the same clothes that she had on when going to Hogsmeade but he was unable to recognize any of the area surrounding her image.

"Minerva, can you hear me? I won't rest until you are safely back here where you belong. Be strong and use that infamous Gryffindor courage to keep your temper," Albus reminded her. He was about to say more but the writing reappeared, wiping away the only sight of Minerva that he had seen in two days.

_We should meet Albus_, wrote the mirror. _Just us, at the killing fields of your greatest victory._

"So are you associated with the once powerful Grindelwald, a relative perhaps? And how will I recognize you?" Albus waited for the mirror to respond and when there was no answer, he decided to press his luck just a bit further. "And bring Minerva with you so that I can see with my own eyes that she is unharmed. If it is truly me that you want, I see no reason to keep her hostage."

_He was a great leader and his work is something, which I wish to continue. You will know me. Tomorrow night at eight___

Albus wanted to correct the misguided person behind the mirror about the work of Grindelwald but feared for Minerva's safety. "And what of Minerva? Will you bring her there as well?"

_You will see tomorrow Albus and come alone_, wrote the mirror for the last time. Albus stared at the mirror, waiting for another message but none came. Now he was torn. He knew that if he informed the Order, they would not permit him to meet this unknown person, without assistance. Yet, he was fully aware that a trap had been laid for him and they were using Minerva as bait. Sighing deeply, he touched the mirror one last time, feeling the same electricity as before and settled his mind. He would meet the person at the designated time and hope that Minerva would not try anything heroic.

Meanwhile, Minerva was curled up on the damp floor clutching her knees to her chest. Everything was such a blur as she struggled to remember what had happened. She had been walking along the street, on her way to the bookshop, when she had been grabbed from behind and dragged away from the crowds. She had fought her would be attacker but the strong hand over her mouth kept her from signaling to any of the dozen or so people nearby for help. She vaguely remembered a male voice muttering some sort of incantation in her ear.

The words had been strange ones, but she could tell that they were some form of ancient magic. Also, the voice in her ear sounded so familiar, yet different. It was almost as if she should remember the person but she lacked the time to really concentrate on the sound of his voice before her world went black. When she had come to, she was in this room, if one could call it that, and the only time she had heard the voice again was when he invaded her thoughts, demanding to know a way to get a private message to Albus Dumbledore without half the wizarding world knowing. Quickly thinking, she knew that Albus would miss her and would come go her rooms.

Her grandmother had always told Minerva special stories about her most cherished possession, the mirror, but she had always believed them to be just that…stories told by an aging grandmother to her favorite grandchild. But something kept drawing her back to the mirror and the overall importance in her grandmother's life. It was as if it had been a lifeline to her at times and that was what Minerva needed now…a lifeline to Albus. Banking all her gold in Gringotts on the chance, Minerva told the kidnapper of the mirror and hoped that if there were some magical properties to it, they would come to her aid now.

As the darkness enveloped her, her thoughts were with Albus and what he was doing. She wondered if her captor had made contact with him. Half of her hoped that Albus would come but the other half didn't want him to risk it because she knew a trap had been planned for him.

The night was even longer for Albus, if that were possible. At least he had seen a glimpse of her and she was still alive. Over and over, he replayed the messages from the mirror in his head, trying to come up with a name or face of the person he was to meet the following evening. Then his thoughts turned to Minerva.

She has been his Deputy for decades and never once had she swayed in her loyalty to him or the school. Now it appeared that her allegiances might cause her harm and that was something Albus wasn't prepared to idly sit by and let happen. Pacing in front of the fireplace in his office, he tried to run through possible scenarios and then arm himself with everything he could possibly need. The next day couldn't come soon enough for Albus. The morning had been painfully slow with the Order members reporting no sightings of his Deputy and then to learn that she had been essentially kidnapped because of him only created more anxiety and worry.

Albus woke in Minerva's rooms, fearful to leave the mirror in case the madman tried to contact him again. His stiff neck ached and his small amount of sleep had been fitful and plagued with images of what might happen as the eight o'clock hour approached. Devising a plan to occupy his trusted colleagues and friends, he retreated to his office to send the necessary owls, explaining very little but assuring them that he had everything under control.

Albus left Hogwarts at a quarter to eight. He had decided to deal with this himself so he knew that alerting his friends to his plans were out of the question. He apparated to the exact spot where he had defeated Grindelwald. It was eerie being there again and Albus felt a chill creep down his spine at the memory.

Fortunately for him, the moon was bright and full and the clearing where the dark wizard had fallen was still protected by a forest with large trees. Making mental notes of the landscape and possible hiding places, he took a deep breath and walked to the center of the field. He didn't like the idea of walking out into the clearing without some sort of shield, whether it be other wizards and witches or an idea of where the potential danger was located. But in this case, he had no choice. Yet, he somehow understood that Minerva was in danger because of him and, bravery or foolishness, he could not hesitate in any of his actions this night.

"Right on time Albus," came a voice through the darkness. "Never one to keep someone waiting, are you?"

"I never saw much point in prolonging the inevitable, if that is what you mean. Time is too precious to waste." Albus paused, listening intently for any movement that might give him some indication of where the man was hiding. When he heard none, he spoke again. "Where's Minerva McGonagall and what is this all about?"

"It must be torture to be so close yet so far away," came the voice of the man as he stepped into the moonlight.

"Tom Riddle! I should've realized it was you when you asked to meet in this very spot where I defeated one of your heroes. Tom, there is still time for you to turn away from this madness and return Minerva safely to Hogwarts. It's me you want and as you can see, I have come alone. Let her so and face me wizard to wizard." Even though Albus could see Voldemort, he had yet to determine if Minerva was nearby.

"Its good to see you Professor," spoke Voldemort with a twisted smile. "Tell me, it must be terribly hard to work day in, day out with someone who you secretly crave."

At first Albus was speechless. He wasn't sure if he had just heard Tom Riddle correctly. "I crave to see you stop this insanity and put an end to the nightly raids you and your followers feel it is your privilege to do. You're hurting innocent people for your own twisted ideas on purebloods."

"I am not here to talk business, Professor," replied Voldemort as he took a step towards Albus. "I see you are dodging the question! Oh how the mighty have fallen."

"You're one to speak of dodging things, Tom. How is life on the run from the Ministry and Aurors? One day they will catch you and today might just be that day! Release Professor McGonagall and we will settle this here and now." Albus knew that if he could keep Tom talking in circles, he might be able to catch a tiny glimpse of Minerva and see her to safety before dueling with the one wizard who embodied the evil of their world.

"I feel alive to be on the run. I am always two steps ahead of those foolish Ministry officials," answered Voldemort. He knew what his old professor was trying to do but this time he wasn't there to duel with Albus. "So, my dear professor, do you miss her?"

"She is a vital part of the school and our world. She is highly respected and more important than you could ever guess in the fight against you and your followers. So, yes I miss her. She is an integral part of what goes on at Hogwarts and in wizarding Europe." The lump in Albus' throat seemed to grow as he tried to answer skillfully and yet honestly. He wasn't sure what his former student had in mind but he was certain that no good could come from it. "Now, where is she," Albus demanded?

"I see you talk from the brain and not heart. What a disappointment you are."

Albus took a step towards the young wizard, gripping his wand tightly inside his pocket in case he had to act quickly. "Fortunately for me, I am not concerned with your approval or disappointment in me. I am more concerned about the safety of my Deputy Headmistress."

The younger wizard took two steps back. He hadn't planned on the Headmaster being so determined and so in control of his emotions. Perhaps his sources had been wrong about the Headmasters feelings for his Deputy.

Albus sensed the growing unease in Tom's voice and demeanor. When he had first stepped into the clearing, the older wizard had been a bit nervous facing someone so much younger and holding captive the woman he had loved for decades. Now, however, it was clear that Tom had something more on his mind than defeating the one wizard with enough power to rally the world against him. But Albus' main goal was to get Minerva to safety and then deal with the threat at hand.

"Be true to yourself Albus Dumbledore," said Voldemort as his eyes scanned the surroundings and his gaze fell upon Minerva, sitting on the grass. She had appeared almost from thin air as Voldemort had spoken.

Minerva looked well and there were no signs of harm but her eyes showed an uncharacteristic fear that Albus had never seen before. He wanted more than anything to run to her and envelop her in his arms, chasing away the anxiety from her stunning emerald green eyes and replacing it with the gaze he had grown to love and admire. Instead, he was forced to stay exactly where he stood until Voldemort made another move. This was a trap, for sure, but there was something different about their meeting. Albus was afraid to move towards Minerva, who he desperately wanted to protect, and Voldemort was afraid he wouldn't.

The younger wizard watched Albus with interest. He could see that the older wizard was fighting a personal conflict within himself and it thrilled him to know that his sources had been correct after all. The sound of a nearby bird was the only noise in the clearing as Minerva stared at Albus who stared at her while both were being watched by her captor.

"Let her go Riddle. This is between us!" Albus never broke eye contact with Minerva as he spoke with power radiating from his body and his voice. The force behind those words could not be overlooked as Minerva imagined Albus' twinkling blue eyes turning to cold hard steel. She had witnessed a display similar to this one when Grindelwald had been defeated decades earlier on this very spot. The only difference now was that she was unable to move, unable to assist Albus if he should need her. The spell that Riddle had cast over her before their arrival had been one she had never heard before and the dark magic was preventing her from breaking through the charm.

"Oh Albus, this is getting tedious now," said Voldemort impatiently. "Her freedom is so easily brought if you speak from the heart."

"Alright! She is my best friend and my right hand at the school. She does not deserve to be placed in the middle of your twisted schemes and should any harm befall her on this night or any other, I will personally see that you spend the remainder of your life in Azkaban where the dementors will no doubt occupy your remaining days." Albus stole a glance at Minerva from the corner of his eye and his mind began to reel with what it would take to get her released safely.

"Tut, tut," said Voldemort shaking his head. "I give you a chance to free her but you do not take it." Both men eyed the other and the tension began to mount as they slowly began to circle each other.

"I have told you what you wanted to hear. I will not play these childish games with you any longer! Since you obviously know what you want to hear, why don't you enlighten us all? I'm sure it would be much easier than trying to read your mind. Or is this all just a ruse to try and strike fear into our hearts? Either way, I will not leave here without her, safe and unharmed."

"Truth, is what I'm after Professor and I did think you were the most truthful and decent wizard of recent times. But, alas, I see I'm wrong," said the younger wizard as he pulled out his wand and pointed it at Minerva.

Fear took hold of Albus' heart. He couldn't stand to see her tortured or even killed before his very eyes. Yet, he also could not risk forcing Riddle's hand in all of this. Swiftly pulling his own wand from his pocket, he pointed it directly at Voldemort. "If you so much as utter the first syllable towards her, I will ensure that the wizarding world has something to celebrate tonight…namely your defeat on this very spot!"

"Not a wise move Albus. I have you surrounded," lied Voldemort with a twisted smile. "Just tell the truth and be done with it or she gets it."

"I've already told you what she means to our world and to the school. I've explained to you the consequences should anything happen to her by your hand. I've given you ample opportunities to let her go and settle this between us. I think it's you who is stalling for time, not me, because you have miscalculated your moves."

"You love a man who doesn't see you as a woman but as a tool to the light side" said Voldemort addressing Minerva.

Minerva's eyes had clouded over but as she tried to rebuff his comments, she found that her voice had been silenced. Looking towards Albus, she tried to tell him with her eyes that she did not believe that to be true for one moment. But as she locked eyes with him, she felt something change and for the first time in her life she felt that maybe he might return her love.

Voldemort watched with delight as Dumbledore's eyes locked with the witch on the ground. He knew that if he waited patiently, Albus would reveal his feelings and his mission would be accomplished. If he could just get Dumbledore to admit his feelings and have Minerva do the same, it would be all the sweeter when he kidnapped and killed Minerva in the nearby future.

"Minerva, you know that I have never thought of you as just a tool. You are much more important to me and I would gladly sacrifice my life for yours. In fact, my world would not be the same without you and Tom is merely trying to weaken and divide us." Minerva tried to offer him a faint smile to show him that she understood what he was trying to say but suddenly she was flying through the air towards the younger wizard as Albus prepared to duel to the death.

Voldemort now had Minerva in his arms with his wand at her throat. He was merely doing this for effect because he knew that the great Albus Dumbledore was at a breaking point. " Do you love her?" he asked as he stroked Minerva's throat with his wand.

Cold blue eyes met vivid panic-stricken green ones as he looked at Minerva, quickly pondering all the possibilities. To answer truthfully would mean admitting something that she had never known before, it would give Voldemort another target in his nightly raids, and it might cost him his best friend. However, a failure to reveal the truth in the matter would result in her death before his very eyes and then she would never know the truth.

"Yes," he said quietly, never breaking eye contact with the only woman to have ever stolen his heart. "I love her but she didn't know until this very moment."

"Finally!" said Voldemort with the look of a cat that had got the cream "Now that wasn't so hard." He chuckled in a deeply sinister way as he watched Minerva's face become a raging sea of emotions ranging from shock to happiness then switching to fear and dread.

"What could you possibly gain from making me admit my feelings for Minerva? Even if she never returns my feelings, I will still need her assistance and cherish her opinions. You see Tom, unlike you, I respect each individual for who they are and what they stand for, not their lineage or upbringing. Now for the last time, this is between us so release her. She's done nothing to you."

"Here, said Voldemort pushing Minerva towards Albus. "I have no use for her yet but I thank you for providing me with a valuable piece of information." And in the blink of the eye, he had apparated away.

Albus extended his arms just in time to catch Minerva in them and envelop her in a warm and comforting embrace. He brushed the hair away from her face and cupped it within his trembling hands. "Minerva, I am so sorry for all of this. I never intended for you to learn of my feelings, at least not like that. I have put you in mortal danger, which is the reason I have kept my secret for so long. Now I have failed you. I am sorry."

Instead of answering him, she brushed her lips against his and waited for him to respond. His lips were soft against her, much softer than she had ever imagined and his warmth seemed to invade every inch of her body. And then everything that she had ever dreamed came true as his arms wrapped around her waist and his lips began to move against hers.

Albus was stunned when Minerva had made such a bold move. He never thought that she could return his love. Oh, he knew that she loved and respected him as a friend, but this was something more than friendship. Feeling her pressed so closely against him, he did the only thing his body would allow and opened his mouth to hers.

She moaned softly into his mouth as she looped her arms around his neck. Her fingers ran through his long silvery hair as they dropped to their knees, overcome with emotions and feelings too deep to put into mere words.

Her response to his caress was more than his heart dared believe, and yet she was answering his touches with passion filled ones of her own. He pulled her into his lap and held her to him, tracing her face with his fingertips as tears streamed down his face, all the worry now erased from it and replaced with overwhelming love.

"Oh Albus, I was so worried he would do something to you" Minerva said softly.

"In a way, he did my dear. He made me admit my greatest weakness…You. And I'm sure he won't hesitate to use it against me…US, should you chose to allow me to properly share my feelings with you."

"We can't go back to what we were like before Albus. Too much has been said and I love you."

He smiled his first smile in two days as the words tumbled from her lips. "Minerva McGonagall, would you grant me the utmost pleasure and honor to court you properly? I'd like to spend the rest of my life protecting you and loving you more and more every day."

"I would be honored to court you Albus and I don't care about Tom."

"I can't tell you how happy that makes me, " he answered. "But dear, we must concern ourselves with him and sooner rather than later I fear. He is growing in power and he now has the key to bringing me to my knees. If he were to ever hurt you, I'm not sure what I would do, especially knowing that it was my fault. Had I admitted my feelings earlier, I might have been able to hide my feelings better, sparing you the horror of these last two days."

"Lets think about that tomorrow Albus," she suggested. "I want to get cleaned up and spend some time with you before having to think about what lies ahead."

Albus stood up and scooped Minerva into his arms. "Then let's apparate home and forget all of the bad parts of this day for now. Tonight, let's focus on us and the beginning of our lives together. I hate to say this but I only admitted my feelings for you through fear but I will never regret that decision as long as you are by my side." Kissing the tip of her nose, they were instantly transported to the gates of Hogwarts…home at last both in body and in heart.

**The End!**


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